Archive for the Daily Cereal Category

Daily Cerealisation: Dirty Creatures – Ep 11. (Shiny new version)

Posted in Daily Cereal, Dirty Creatures on 1 August, 2007 by sonal

Guard B resumes shaving the Playwright while the other two guards hold him down.

Guard B: So, you write?
Pay well?
Ever thought about throwing it all in?
My boy here thinks he’s a bit of a poet.

Guard A: Mum!

Guard B: What did I say?

Guard A: Sorry ma’am.

Guard B: Go on, read him some of your stuff.

Guard A: No!

Guard B: He’s modest. I said, read it to him, or I’ll do it for you.

Guard A: I don’t, I don’t know any.

Guard B: What about that one you’ve got in your pocket?

Guard A: No.

Guard B: Waiting for a quiet moment to meet him?

Guard A: No I wasn’t.

Guard B: So you do have one on you? Give it here.
I said, give it here.

She reads the following to herself. It’s up to the production to decide how and whether this poem is ever revealed …
The poem reads: You showed me the horizon
You wanted me to see,
Your happy children dancing in the sunlight,
Without a care, Lasezze faise
In fraternity,
In liberty,
In property and prosperity

But I couldn’t see anything
Except sky
And earth
And rain
And you mad at me because I could not see
My own hand in front of my face
The truth in front of my eyes, that I was calling lies
You called me a dirty creature – unintelligent, wilfully negligent of
Your feelings
Your hopes
Your desires
And you would not believe me
When I said that all I could see
Was sky
And earth
And rain

Guard B: What is this?

Guard A: Nothing.

Guard B: What’s that?

Guard A: It’s nothing ma’am.

Guard B: Shall I show it to our friend here?

Leader’s Guard: Oh, I don’t (like poems) …

Guard A: No!

Guard B screws up the poem into a ball and drops it. She returns to shaving the Playwright.

Guard B: Go home.

Guard A: What?

Guard B: You’re dismissed, go home.

Guard A: I’m not (going home) …

Guard B: Stand down Sergeant. You’re no longer required today.

Guard A leaves. The set up continues in the room.


So, about that play

Posted in Daily Cereal, Dirty Creatures on 31 July, 2007 by sonal

One of the disadvantages of posting a work in progress is that you will go back and throw out whole chunks because the bit you wrote just doesn’t work.

So last night I threw out the last three pages of the play because it didn’t progress the story as well as I wanted it to. The last two episodes are no longer, so I’ve password protected them out of the canon (and so I’ve got them on archive in case I want to reuse that material later). The new shiny bits will go up later today, but if you are curious about what the changes are and want to compare the password is: It’s crap

Because it really, really is …

Protected: Daily Cerealisation – Dirty Creatures, Ep 12 (old version)

Posted in Daily Cereal, Dirty Creatures on 30 July, 2007 by sonal

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Protected: Daily Cerealisation: Dirty Creatures – Ep 11. (Old version)

Posted in Daily Cereal, Dirty Creatures on 23 July, 2007 by sonal

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Daily Cerealisation: Dirty Creatures – Ep 10.

Posted in Daily Cereal, Dirty Creatures on 19 July, 2007 by sonal

Guard A and the Leader’s Guard take the Playwright into the bathroom. Guard B opens the hotel room door, signals down the corridor and pulls in a laundry trolley. She takes the bag off the end and pulls out the shirt, the hoodie and new wiring. She lays them out on the table. She prepares a shaving kit next to the shirt. While she does this, a variety of technicians come in and start to wire up the room with light stands, reflectors, microphones etc, creating an interview area. The Playwright, Guard A and the Leader’s Guard re-enter the room. They dress the Playwright taking care to wire him up properly. Guard B sits in front of him and begins to shave him with a razor. The other Guards begin to wire him up, the Playwright struggles.

Guard B: Stay still 228, you wouldn’t want me to accidentally cut your throat now would you?

Playwright: I don’t care.

Guard B: Hey, you know what, that’s fine with me, I really don’t care. Of course, it does mean that I’m going to have to tell, er … what’s their names again?

Leader Guard: Mei and Lily.

Guard B: Yes, Mei and Lily … I just don’t quite know what words to use with such little ones. How do you tell them that their father would rather die that seeing them without creating too much trauma?
You do want to see them, don’t you?

© Sonal Patel, 2007

Daily Cerealisation: Dirty Creatures – Ep 9.

Posted in Daily Cereal, Dirty Creatures on 18 July, 2007 by sonal


The lights snap up as the Playwright suddenly regains consciousness. He sits up with a start. He is in a plush hotel room. He looks around confused. He is now in a dressing gown, he feels around his stomach, it’s sore but there are no wires. He climbs out of bed and opens the bathroom door. Inside, two of the NZ guards are playing cards. They look up from their game, the Playwright slams the door shut again, he opens the curtains and one of the Leader’s guards is having a smoke. The guards re-enter the room.

Guard B: Good morning 228.

Guard A: Number 228 you will stand at the front of your Residence with your hands raised, (palms open) …

Guard B: No, you don’t need to do that here.

Guard A: I thought every opportunity is a good (opportunity) …

Guard B: It’s inappropriate here.

Guard A: Why.

Guard B: Because we’re no longer in a prison you moron.

Guard A: Mum! Not in front (of him).

Guard B: And don’t call me that when we’re working.

Guard A: Fine, sir.

Guard B: Watch it you. Go get him showered.

© Sonal Patel, 2007

Daily Cerealisation: Dirty Creature – Ep 8.

Posted in Daily Cereal, Dirty Creatures on 17 July, 2007 by sonal

The Leader’s guards restrain the playwright as the prison guards begin to remove the books, pens, pencils – anything that is vaguely sharp and/or can be used as a missile.

Playwright: Get it off me! Get this fucking thing off me!

The Dictator and the Leader speak over the Playwright’s cries, for the most part ignoring him.

Leader: I think that was successful.

Dictator: I’m still not convinced that he needed to be briefed.

Leader: Oh, rubbish, look at him.

Playwright: You fucking monsters!

Leader: He’s got passion, he’s alive and he still has hope. Hope is important for us.

Playwright: I’ll fucking die before I become a martyr for you.

Leader: Yes, that’s the spirit. I’d like the family to be at the press conference.

Dictator: Yes, that should be fine, I can’t see any problem with that.

Leader: We’ll reunite them there.

Playwright: Let go of me!

Dictator: Are you sure that’s wise.

Leader: Oh yes, the dramatic moment, it will play so well. Especially in hindsight.

Playwright: I’m not helping you!

Leader: Good for you. We can’t afford to do it without him. We don’t want to look like our friends in the West.

Dictator: We are in the West.

Leader: The Pacific. You’re the nice guys of the Pacific remember? We need to keep that for as long as possible.

Dictator: I understand all of that, sir, but he …

Playwright: You fucking cunts! You won’t get away with this!

Dictator: … can’t be trusted in front of the press.

Leader: I know. I’m relying on it.

Dictator: Fine.

Leader: You don’t want to check with your Prime Minister?

Dictator: She trusts that I will make the best decision for the party.

Leader: Good. We need to coordinate this quickly. I have an excellent media director who can start working on this straight away.

Playwright: You’re not going to fucking make me do this, I’ll fucking kill you!

Dictator:They will need to work in conjunction with our senior advisor.

Leader: Of course, we need to make sure that the message is (consistent) … look do you mind, my lot have something that will calm him down.

Dictator: You managed to get them in with you?

Leader: Of course. You’ve got one on you haven’t you Mei?

Leader’s Guard (Mei): Yes sir.

The Dictator nods, the Leader nods at his Guard, the Guard produces a syringe and puts the needle into the Playwright. Slowly the playwright becomes limp. The lights begin to fade to black as he loses consciousness.

Leader: Where was I?

Dictator: Consistency. We can’t afford to have any contradictions.

Leader: You don’t want it to be too perfect either, you still need to bluster and stumble too. How about some one on one interviews? I can get you BBC, CNN, Al Jazeera English, Star News …

Dictator: We can give you John Campbell, Mark Sainsbury, we could probably even dust off Paul Holmes …

Leader: Never heard of them, are they useful?

Dictator: More for me than you.

© Sonal Patel, 2007