Changing My Status
It’s been an interesting year.
When I started this blog a little over a year ago, it was the day of the Chapman Tripp theatre awards and I was sitting in my jammies and dressing gown at 3 in the afternoon – hey, I was going to have to shower for awards night so why do it twice? Plus I wanted to look fabulous, drop-dead, you’re-going-to-regret-you-ever-dumped-me gorgeous … can you guess who else was going that night? Suffice to say, it was a long, difficult and sober night (I didn’t trust myself to drink), I looked traffic stopping beautiful, but my heart was in a lot of pain. It didn’t matter too much, I was soon to be on a plane to get away from the weekly reminders of the person I once wanted to spend the rest of my life with.
Well it’s been a year of ups and downs, as many of you have paid witness but this morning, as I contemplated getting out of bed, I realised that being broken up with was the best thing that could’ve happened to me. If David and I had stayed together, all of the fantastic things that happened this year would not have – no blog; no Tamasha; no Emma, Brook, Marie, Helen, Bonny, Rhonda, Sandi, Margaret, Lotte … ; I wouldn’t have found my real writing voice or what I wanted to do with my life; I wouldn’t have realised how fantastic it is to just be me; I also would not have learnt that the heart does heal, that a bad break up or relationship does not leave you a scarred, permanently damaged person … in fact, it seems to have made me more confident and self assured.
So with that, I removed my relationship status from Facebook. I don’t want to be defined by my statushood and all the ways it can be interpreted. I am more than happily single, I’m loving it, I’m revelling in it, there is no biological clock that is telling me that time is running out … it’s all an illusion, I’m just happy to enjoy life as it is.
Right now plans and troublemaking are afoot – I’ve managed to get myself quite busy once I land in New Zealand, not to mention the things I’m working on right now, oh and Edinburgh? Yes, I think there will be an Edinburgh in the mix …
2008 is looking to be a very good year indeed.